A therapist's reflection on recent events
Hello, again. It’s been a while and I think it’s time we have a chat.
You might have noticed my absence from my social media platforms — Facebook, Instagram, my blog — since the news of George Floyd and Breonna Taylor came out and protests began. I did write a small post on Facebook and made a story on my Instagram about me taking a step back to better gather my thoughts, but I think I’ve taken enough of a break and am ready to open up for real conversations.
Now, while some things I post and some of my opinions could be seen as “political”, I was hesitant with writing anything regarding the Black Lives Matter movement simply because I felt undereducated to write about it. As a white woman, I am aware of my privilege and am aware that the colour of my skin protects me from negative stereotyping, difficulties with finding work or getting into school, and it definitely protects from certain kinds of violence. I am also in a place of privilege based on where I live and my career — the Netherlands is largely a liberal and egalitarian society, open to new ideas and accepting (mostly) of these current protests; I am not struggling with paying my rent or feeding myself, and genuinely love the work I do.
All of these things put me in a place of privilege, something that I have been trying to confront head-on. This has been an uncomfortable process for me (as it should be!) — trying to stay up-to-date with the news of what is happening back home, trying to understand my implicit biases (read a bit about it here: https://perception.org/research/implicit-bias/ or test out your own implicit biases here: https://implicit.harvard.edu/implicit/), and trying to better understand what my privilege is and how that affects my daily life. But no matter how uncomfortable it makes me, I know that is in and of itself is a privilege to learn about racism and to not be born into it.
For all of my white or white passing readers, get used to feeling uncomfortable because being uncomfortable helps create positive changes. This is something I am constantly reiterating during my work as a therapist, that in order to understand what needs changing and how to do it, you must get uncomfortable. And this is the time that we, as a society, as humans, have to get uncomfortable.
We can not only stay silent or plead fortunate and privileged ignorance. We can no longer stay silent when friends, family, coworkers, our own neighbours, innocent men, women, and children are being mistreated and murdered simply because of the colour of their skin. It is time to look inwards and reflect on what our implicit biases are, it is time we educate ourselves because it is not the job of our POC friends to do that for us. We can no longer put the burden of education onto those who are facing these cruelties every day. We must do it ourselves.
So, I want to share with you some resources for all of my white readers to go to, to become more educated on the subject of systemic racism, implicit biases, and how you can actively be anti-racist and make a change.
A concise and detailed list of articles, books, movies, etc. : https://www.goodgoodgood.co/anti-racism-resources
A detailed article on how and where to donate: https://nymag.com/strategist/article/where-to-donate-for-black-lives-matter.html
Breonna Taylor’s murderers are still free and are not facing criminal charges: https://www.change.org/p/andy-beshear-justice-for-breonna-taylor
It’s time we have this talk, it has been time for this conversation, do not shy away.
