Overwhelmed and Overstimulated: A therapist’s 5 tips on dealing with the world today
There has always seemed to be this long-standing belief that as professionals, especially in the mental health field, we shouldn’t share anything political or what our beliefs may be. This idea never made sense to me. How are you supposed to know if you can relate to your clients or if your clients can relate to you as their therapist if they don’t know where they stand? Especially when today’s politics are focused heavily on identities -- gender, sexuality, race, ethnicity, religion. When it comes to identity, your safety is the most important thing.
And over the past few years (since COVID), it feels almost unethical not to comment on the world. As a therapist (and, honestly, just as a person), I’m acutely aware of the emotional and mental impact the world today causes every single person on this planet. I see it firsthand with almost everyone I’ve ever worked with. And over the past year or two, this has just increased more and more. The wars, the climate, elections, and the general feeling of uncertainty are all so many of us think about, and even when we’re trying not to pay attention, it’s always around us.
How could I not comment on this? Beyond my profession, I’m just another person being bombarded with hate and fear every time I turn on the news or open TikTok or Instagram. Like so many other people, I am afraid this won’t ever end (or at least any time soon). So, it seems like an ethical responsibility to acknowledge this and help provide any tips I have to help you survive, continue forward, and regulate yourself and your emotions.
Consider limitations on news and any apps you use to get your news
First and foremost, it may be time to start limiting your news consumption, including any apps you may use to get your news (yes, this also means TikTok—at least my algorithm has gotten very grim). I often find this tip difficult to share and suggest to others because it can be interpreted in a way that implies being informed is negative.
This is not a suggestion to stop learning or consuming altogether, but rather to understand your limits and check out for the day when you feel sufficiently informed. This is about preventing and moderating the doom scrolling, the constant refreshing, and the hypervigilance of any change as much as possible. You have to know your limit and listen to your mind’s and body’s signs that it’s getting to be a bit too much at that particular moment. And I honestly mean in the right now. Not all the time, but for right now.
For those of you who may not know what those signs can be, allow me to illustrate using my own personal example. I strive to be as informed as possible about what is happening in the world; I don’t want to live my life in my own bubble, unaware of what’s happening around me. So, every morning, after making coffee and greens and taking my medicine and vitamins, I sit on the couch and turn on the news. I’ve been doing this every morning for years and have valued this little morning routine. Usually, I would have the news on while I plan and prep for my day, and I can usually not be consumed by it all. Then, during most of my day, I may see a story online, but I wouldn’t be glued to the screen. However, over the past year or so, I’ve found myself obsessed with being up to date with everything happening in the world. And, over time, I’ve noticed my own nervous system dysregulation -- a fast heartbeat, doomsday thinking (or catastrophizing), anger or sadness, and high stress levels -- which would nearly always subside once I change the channel or get off my phone.
It takes self-awareness to tell when your body and mind are telling you it’s time to stop, especially when there’s a sense of guilt if you stop or a feeling of obligation to keep consuming. However, while a lot can change quickly, knowing immediately when it’s happening may not be necessary in your life. Yes, I know this sounds harsh, and trust me, I’ve struggled with this too, but being immediately informed may be causing your body more harm than actually helping you.
So, don’t just stop consuming; consider limiting your consumption per day. This can always change and fluctuate depending on whatever works for you. My limitations may not work well for you, and yours may not work well for me, but the only thing that matters is that you know when you’ve reached your limits and that you respect those very limits.
Protect your peace
You are allowed to protect your peace at any cost worth you. But my peace is worth a lot more than some people I’ve had in my life. Again, I know this can seem harsh at first, but your well-being is the most important thing to you -- if you’re not well, you’re not well for anyone in your life or for any of the causes you are working for.
With my clients, I use the example of what flight attendants always say in their safety announcements (hopefully, this won’t be news to those who fly). If the oxygen masks fall, always put your mask on first before assisting anyone else, including children. This is because, without oxygen in your lungs, you won’t be able to help anyone else. Literally. You’ll pass out, and if those around you need help, it’s safe to say they won’t be able to help you if you manage to help them first.
Essentially, you’re no good to anyone if you’re not caring for yourself. So take care of yourself, even if that means having no or minimal contact with friends, family, in-laws, whoever. You are allowed to protect your peace however you see fit, and no one can tell you that it’s wrong. That doesn’t mean it won’t necessarily feel bad at first, but you matter more than someone else’s feelings because you’re stuck with yourself and no one else. So make sure you like the person you’re stuck with.
Find your community and lean on each other.
Community is so important. It can be everything; it is everything. A community is full of people who love, care, and respect one another; a group of people who have similar beliefs and morals; and people who share similar identities. Your community is your people, and your people are your family. The people in your community have your back, will support you, will be there for you, and will encourage you.
Right now, so many of us feel unsafe in so many spaces and situations, which leaves many of us at home, feeling alone and scared. By building your community, you will gain spaces where you can be. The ability to just be as you are with like-minded and safe people can do wonders for your mental health, including emotional support, increased resilience, access to resources, and reduced stress, to name a few. (If you want to know more about building a community, post it in a comment below!)
Emotional regulation -- mindfulness and grounding
A crucial skill in general is emotional regulation, but especially now when, at any moment (whether you want to or not), you may very well be confronted with images and sound bites from the news. Pick your disturbing and upsetting images/sound bites, as now there feel like too many to choose from. If you’re able to regulate your emotions, you’ll be able to sooner recover from whatever may be upsetting or painful.
Emotional regulation can look different for each person, and you’ll have to experiment to find what works for you. In the past, I’ve written about mindfulness and what that can look like, so I want to give some tips for grounding. Grounding exercises are incredibly beneficial to help manage feelings of stress and anxiety specifically. Still, they can be used for just about anything. Here are a few of my personal favorites:
Square breathing -- this is, obviously, a breathing technique that can be useful to help ground you from feelings of anxiety. It’s a simple technique that can be used anytime and anywhere. It goes like this: breath in for 4 seconds, hold at the top for 4 seconds, exhale for 4 seconds, hold at the bottom for 4 seconds. Repeat for as long as you need.
Grounding through your 5 senses is an easy technique to bring you back to the here and now and reconnect with your surroundings. This technique uses all 5 of your senses separately to force your attention internally and to what’s happening around you. It goes like this: Name 5 things you can see, name 4 things you can hear, name 3 things you can feel, name 2 things you can smell, and name 1 thing you can taste.
Ground yourself, literally -- this one is one of my tops that can’t be done anywhere you want but can help a lot. And it’s by far the easiest one. Just lay on the ground. Literally put ground yourself, on your floor, in the grass, just wherever you feel comfortable to get down and stay down.
These are just three examples, but you can find many other great grounding techniques online.
Ask for help
Last but certainly not least, know when to ask for help. And know that you can always ask for help. Whether this is through your community, your family, or with a profession like us at Therapy with Olivia, know that it’s okay not to be able to handle everything on your own. And know that there are people who can and will help you.
If you want to start your therapeutic journey, you can always contact us and schedule a free consultation call. You can either go through the contact page on this website or email us directly at info@therapywitholivia.com, and we will pair you with the right therapist for you on our team.
